Pog Pictures

I just wrote a whole post, went to press publish and….my laptop died.  Taking it as a sign that either it a) was not worth reading or 2) my laptop and I need a break, here are a few photos instead:

Secret bakering this week….

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Resulted in a note from someone :o) :

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The sunflowers I planted with the kids next door have come up.  The kids aren’t even a little bit interested, and I do all the watering, but it adds some colour to their side :o)

 

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One of my lovely friends bought me a tshirt (I have CDO.  It’s like OCD, but the letters are in alphabetical order like they should be).  I don’t know what she was getting at…. :o)

w3

 

 

And in response to the fact that there consistently seem to be insufficient hours in the day, the coffee shop I pass on the way to work read my mind:

w4Anyone want to join me?  No scuba diving though…. :0)

 

 

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Little Pea and Me

I was well overdue a Little Pea and Me day.  So overdue I’d completely forgotten how chaotic it can be.  Last time we certainly couldn’t have something vaguely resembling a conversation, which we did on Saturday.  We had lots of conversation….

As Little Pea seems to think everything is blue, I had the brilliant idea that raspberry picking would help him learn two colours.  We’d come away with full punnets of fresh fruit, an understanding of red and green and a bond developed doing a new activity outside.

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Little Pea picked three red rasperries, tried one, announced ‘I don’t like it’, threw the remaining two on the ground and ran off to see the horse:

r3‘What colour is the horse?’  I asked, determined we’d learn something.  ‘Blue’.  Of course it was.

Next the view caught his attention:

r2

‘Wow, a castle!  I run to the castle!’  And he took off….

I caught him and tried to entice him back with bug spotting, but that only lasted so long.  After about 10 minutes I was informed ‘Hot. Going to sit down’ and he took himself off to a chair and watched me as I frantically tried to fill at least one punnet.

Next stop:  Pog Towers to make some biscuits for Mummy (Sister 1).  It turns out that Little Pea likes cinnamon.  Even more when it’s mixed with sugar, and definitely when rolled into puff pastry.  Cook it all together though, and he’s not impressed.  We left Pog Towers with Little Pea clutching a bag of biscuits (which were crumbs by the time we reached his house), and the only small disaster had been him eating a toy snail eye.  I managed to extract the second from his mouth but was too late for the first one (they were only teeny tiny though, so we decided not to worry).

Lunch went smoothly and I thought I’d do what I did as a nanny years ago and let him run around in the garden without a nappy, with the potty to hand (argh – I’ve just relaised that the two year old I did this with for an entire summer as his nanny, will now be 20.  God, I feel old).  I  popped out the room to wash up quickly before we went to the garden and….everything went quiet.  I ran back in thinking something bad must have happened to find Little Pea sitting on the potty!  My joy was taken over by horror though, as he informed me that ‘I am a tiger and I am doing a giant poo’ and a stench like nothing I have ever smelled before filled the room.  I don’t know what that tiger ate (other than a bit of raw pastry and a snail’s eye), but it was not good.  At all.  As I ran up the stairs with a very full potty (he was true to his word on the giant part), I very, very nearly threw up my lunch.

After garden time we went to the park.  It turns out that there a couple of things adults can do too…We spent a long time taking it in turns on the slide….

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And this thing goes round and round when pushed.  Even with a Pog inside and a Little Pea doing the pushing.  And he suddenly didn’t seem to understand the words ‘Poggy needs to get out now’…

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I love this photo.  He was dancing on the ‘stage’, swigging his beaker of juice, not a care in the world.,  I bet in about 16 years someone will post an almost identical one of him on Facebook or whatever we have then at a club or a festival or something.  And I’ll get this one out to do a compare and contrast.  Because that is what an auntie should do, right?

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By the end of the day, this was pretty much me:

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But I loved every minute of it.  Apart from the giant poo part.  That, I didn’t love.  :o)

 

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There’s one over there >>>>

For those of you that don’t know, last year I went to Tacloban to do some relief work in the wake of Typhoon Yolanda / Haiyan.  It wasn’t an organised thing.  A colleague in the US had family there, we both wanted to do something useful and we put our heads together.  We raised money – quite a bit as it turned out.  In June Jackie went out and used half of it on people identified locally who had lost livelihoods.  In August I went out with the rest of the money.

Last month we both went out at the same time, finally met, spent time together and revisited a lot of the people we’d helped support.  You can read my update  – should you be interested, here.  Jackie’s update is here.

:o)

And here are some of my favourite photos from then, if you just want a taster:

hh4 hh5 hh10 hh11 hh12 hh13 hh14 hh15

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The importance of cake and some alternative makingness

Between breaking and fixing my toilet and having cameras inserted places I’d rather they haven’t been, I’ve got a bit of makingness done too.  I’ve finished crocheting two Christmas presents (and am now trying to design a pattern for a third, which may be a bit of  a mistake), and have done a spot of secret bakering for this month.

I should have taken note that was called a Marmalade loaf and specified a loaf tin for cooking, but as I was making four of them, and only had one loaf tin I ignored that and just popped them in normal tins.  As a result, the loaf refused to cake and was a little on the heavy side….  The homeless man on The Strand that I gave some to for breakfast didn’t seem to mind though, and it all disappeared in the office:

make 2

 

And as the sign said on the way into work:

make 1And a cake is a cake.  And we all need to avoid kidnapping….

And in another potential creative moment, I decided to take some photos in the dark.  It was at 1am and I couldn’t sleep and it seemed sensible at the time.  I’m not sure they worked entirely (you can’t see what you’re actually getting in the frame, you obviously can’t focus, which means it’s a bit tricky), and you really do need a flash, or you end up with this:

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Which is never going to impress anyone.  But I liked the way things stood out more than they seem to in daylight.  Well, you see what you think:

make 4

make 5

make 7

make 6

 

Maybe it’s something to try next time you can’t sleep:o)

 

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Loss of dignity, and the ability to type

I wasn’t going to write this post as I thought I’d lose some dignity.  But then I realised after this week I have pretty much no dignity left and I couldn’t explain the couple of giggles I had without telling you the full story.  So…

….on Wednesday I had to go to hospital for a colonoscopy.  If you don’t know what that is, don’t worry – it will become quite obvious very shortly.  Having had a camera shoved down my throat into my tummy a few months back and having a pretty horrible time of it, I was a bit scared of this one.  It turns out there was no need.  The really bad bit was the preparation.

The hospital had kindly provided me with powders to make up two litres of laxatives which I had to drink three hours apart.  I can only describe it as Lemsip with added salt.  I can’t even drink Lemsip since I had flu years and years ago, so it proved to be a bit of a challenge.  I had two hours to drink each litre and the only thing I could do was to sit very, very still on my back door step while sipping slowly so I didn’t throw the whole lot up.

Two hours later I decided I must be a bit weird as nothing had happened.  2.5 hours later I discovered I should have enjoyed those moments of quiet as the magic quite definitely started.  (Now you might see why I was so intent on fixing my toilet in the last post).

The instructions had suggested that a ‘barrier cream might be beneficial’.  I didn’t really understand the concept, but after my 20th dash to the toilet when I thought I may have caught fire, I wondered if olive oil might do the trick.  I didn’t have time to find out though.  I lost count on my 50th trip to the toilet and just focussed on being grateful that I live in the teeniest house ever built as it at least I had a two minute sit down before the next mad dash.

By the time Wednesday morning arrived I felt like a wrung out dish cloth.  I was given a gown at the hospital, taken to a room and introduced to the staff who would be carrying out the procedure.  I would rather have been ignored and avoided eye contact, but that British spirit won out and I found myself shaking various hands.  Then it got even more surreal.  As I lay on my side on the bed, bottom exposed, telling myself that ‘they see this everyday’, the doctor decided it was a good time to strike up a conversation. ‘Ooooh, big birthday coming up!’ he said, looking at my date of birth on the screen which would soon be showing pictures of my colon.  I felt this wasn’t the time or place for small talk, and told him to ‘Shhhhh – it’s not until next year.’  And was promptly lulled into a lovely sedative fog (because no, you don’t go to sleep for this – you’re just sedated and positioned so you can see the screen as the camera winds its way around your insides….)

Anyway, it all went fine, I was given a cheese sandwich and a cup of tea as a reward and went home to sleep.

Unfortunately, my manager wanted me in the office the next day.  I wasn’t allowed to drive so he told me to get a taxi to the station.  All was fine and I was quite amazed to find myself in front of my desk at the usual time, typing away.  Only someone must have moved the keys around a little bit as my typing was ever so slightly off.  It made sense, but the words all changed around a bit.  Luckily I have a very understanding colleague who sanity checked everything I wrote and caught my mistakes, but by lunchtime I thought I was probably ok and posted something to the company intranet.  It was only when someone contacted me to question what I’d written that I realised the drugs were probably still in my system in some shape or form.  I had been asking people to ‘join a hub group’.  What I’d actually asked people to do was ‘join a group hug’.

:o)

...and so are some furry things we didn't know the name of.

There isn’t really an appropriate picture for this post, so here’s a pretty one from months ago

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(Not a very good) Plumber Pog

Last Monday I got back from my holiday.  Despite 30 hours of travelling and sleep snatched in 15minute bursts, totalling about 3 hours, I was wide awake when I arrived home.  I didn’t consider sleeping until 2.30am when I got into bed to hear the sound of my toilet overflow dripping in quite an enthusiastic way.

It had been like this before I went on holiday.  For a few weeks before I went, in fact.  I’d decided to leave it until I got back before I got someone in to fix it.  I don’t know why – I can only assume that my sleep deprived brain decided that as I had conquered scuba diving I clearly had water based super powers – but at 2.30am I decided I could fix the toilet and stop that slightly irritating dripping sound.

At 4am I realised I was a complete idiot with no clue about plumbing and that any super powers I might have had been left in the Philippines. The dripping was now more of a pouring and the water tank in the loft, just above my head, was constantly refilling.  I went to bed with ear plugs in and my pillow over my head.  At 7am I called my lovely fixer man to inform him I’d broken the toilet.

Lovely fixer man arrived about 9am, decided that half of the inside of my toilet needed replacing and set about the job.  Meanwhile, I made us both a coffee, managed to pour mine (newly made and black, so pretty much boiling) down my jeans.  I screamed, stripped in the kitchen and terrified the life out of fixer man when he ran in to see what had happened to find me in my knickers and tshirt….

Anyway, eventually we both got over the embarrassment, fixer man fixed, left and I flushed the toilet again, just to hear the silence of no drippy bits.  At that point, it broke again – this time, the other side.  Now it wouldn’t stop flushing unless I fiddled with the broken bit.

I called the fixer man back, but I must have scared him more than I thought as he didn’t reply until the evening.  As it was way past working hours I asked him how to fix it myself (I thought the super powers may have just had a bit of jet lag and could have woken up by now).  I was given instructions of which bit to remove, told which bit to move up and down to get rid of the lime scale that had probably got lodged into it after the work in the morning and set about my task.

Please remember at this point I’d had about 6 hours sleep in the last 45 or so.  That is why, I think, I didn’t just more the bit up and down, I moved it round and round.  And promptly snapped a part of it off.  I realised it was quite a key part, but that was ok, because I had superglue…

It turns out superglue and sleep deprivation are not a good combination.  10 minutes later I’d superglued my had to the toilet part.  The bit I needed to stick to it was looking at me from the draining board.  I suspect it would have laughed, had it not been a small bit of plastic.  Luckily, I’d used so much superglue that I managed to chip my hands from the bit of toilet with a knife and try out a friends suggestion from when I’d superglued kitchen roll to my hands a few months back, that nail varnish removes it.  (It does – but you need industrial quantities of the stuff when dealing with most of a tube).

Anyway, I managed to superglue the broken bit on and put the thingy back in the toilet and….I’d made no difference whatsoever.

The next day I called the fixer man back to plead for more help.  It turned out he’d been asking at his local suppliers for a new thingy, but they didn’t stock them anymore. I would probably need an entirely new cistern.  I wasn’t keen on this (and neither was he – I’m not sure if that was due to the fact I have a teeny bathroom with one of those hidden cisterns, or if it was the thought of me in my knickers), so I went on the internet.  I found what may or may not have been the right part and ordered it.  On Saturday it arrived, I fitted it and….you’ll never guess what…I actually fixed it!  My toilet is now working perfectly and I’m considering plumbing as a profession.

So maybe I do have water based super powers after all.  Or maybe if you just keep on breaking things until you have to replace them all, at some point something has got to work out ok :o)

Theses two were my friends on holiday.  They probably have water super powers, unlike me.

Theses two were my friends on holiday. They probably have water super powers, unlike me.

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I DID IT!

Yesterday I actually became SSI certified! I have done 6 official dives (plus one in the pool and one which doesn’t count because it was mainly exercises) and I passed my theory exam.

I have seen ghost pipe fish, scorpion fish, sea snakes, nudey branches…I’m not sure if that is the right spelling, but this is a picture of one I photograhed from my instructors computer:

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It’s a pyjama nudey branch and is a little like a slug in PJs. I have seen hundreds of different fish and sea creatures ans the most beautiful corals.

Yesterday I swam with a HUGE shoal of sardines. Again, this is my photo of a picture (and unfortunately we had really bad visibility so it wasn’t quite as good as this) but to give you an idea:

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There are millions in the shoal, apparently….

I’d love to say that I am now a diving convert, but it didn’t get easier. If it hadn’t been for the patience of my amazing instructor, Peter, there is no way I would have qualified. This man deserves a medal:image

A few things didn’t go quite to plan (of course they didn’t) but I learned a lot about diving and about me….

– I had to learn to do a back roll (well, fall backwards) off a boat. When water up your nose is a massive fear it doesn’t matter how many 1,2,3’s the boat crew count for you, it isn’t going to happen until you realise you really do have no option.  I’ve done 4 of those rolls now. It still takes at least three attempts though.

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– I managed to get myself in such a panic on one dive I really did throw up. This is an interesting experience at about 12m under water when you can’t pop up on to the surface, and not one I am keen to repeat. If you have a Peter with you though, you can be sick, have a coughing fit, have him remind you to breathe and then distract you with some pretty fishies and carry on like nothing happened.

– It turns out that whatever the panic I am like a small child when it comes to distraction with fishies. (It’s a shame the same wouldn’t work on a crowded tube train).

– And as lovely as Peter was, he was mean too. He made me take my mask off underwater for a second time, even though I had already passed the exercise. I made him promise we could do it in shallow water so I could get to the surface and get water out my nose if I needed to. We went to shallow water, I finally took my mask off, put it back on, inhaled half the ocean, signalled in panic that I had to go up and….Peter shook his head, held onto me and started pointing out pretty fishies. I hated him. My nose hurt, my eyes stung. It was 40 minutes before our dive finished. But only about 3 before I forgot I had to get to the surface….

– So not only did he show me I was capable of more than I thought, but on my final dive I thanked my lucky stars for his ‘meaness’.  The current was strong as we were doing our safety stop (you have to stay at 5m for 3 minutes to stop nasties happening to your body) so we hung onto the rope of a buoy. As I grabbed it I guess the current pushed me – my mask came mostly off and my regulator fell out.  I couldn’t go up, but Peter’s training actually kicked in and I realised I could manage the situation. Who would have thunk it?!

That said, I have spent all today on dry land, reading a book :) I think I will probably dive again, but maybe not for a little while. It’s all a bit hair raising:

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I am quite proud. I have done something that really scared me. That’s my braveness quota used up for the forseeable future though :)

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Another new experience

Here are a few facts about me that may add a little more context to this post:
1) I swim like a swan. Not in an elegant sort of way. In a ‘must keep head and entire neck out of the water at all times’ sort of way.
2) I’ve not put my head under water since the early 1980’s when a swimming teacher threw me in the deep end of a pool and I got water up my nose.
3) I hate swimming in the sea. Especially if there is a chance i will get water up my nose or in my eyes.
4) I have been known to take bottles of tap water to the beach to wash sea water off me because it feels so icky.
5) I have learned through yoga that when I am having a panic I can control it by breathing entirely though my nose.
6) I am on holiday where there is a dive school, but I knew if I was brave enough to try scuba diving it would definately be a one off and in all likelihood I wouldn’t get past the bit in the pool.

I didn’t tell the dive instructor any of these things when I found myself signing up for my SSI (Scuba Schools International) qualification. It was still a bit of a surprise though, that today, even after a panic attack in the pool, he agreed to let me do a sea dive when I pleaded with him (I knew if I didn’t do it today I would have no chance of talking myself into it), despite the not insignificant waves.

I was terrified. When you have a panic attack in the sea, breathing through your nose is not a good option as your mask fills up (see 3) ), which increases the panic, which makes your breakfast start to make a re-appearance, which makes you panic even more as how on earth can you be sick with the breathy thing in your mouth? And that is kind of how it continued.

I’m not sure it is standard practice to make the instructor hold your hand the whole time, but frankly, he didn’t have a choice.  It also turns it that 1) is an issue. I am used to swimming at that angle, but underwater when you do that you start rising…

What I saw under the water though, was amazing. A completely different world. I saw fish that swim vertically, a huge eel, a teeny jellyfish blue starfish, feather star fish and fish….more fish than I have ever soon in one place. And so many different types of coral.

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The moment the sun shone. My dive was just past where the water changes colour. I swam all the way in choppy waves!

However, if I am completely honest, if the weather here had gone more to plan (although the sun came out for a short while today…hooray!  I was in the classroom most of the time doing my theory though. Humph), I probably wouldn’t go again. It was amazing, but I was terrified and I am not terribly keen on putting myself in terrifying situations.

But as I said, I have signed up for the couse. And tomorrow i am off on a boat to do TWO dives and a lot more exercises.  The other thing I haven’t told my instructor is that I get very sea sick. And today I found out you can’t take sea sickness tablets before diving. I think he must have sensed it though (or just had enough of me today) as tomorrow I have a different instructor… :o)
image P1: my equipment

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A not entirely relaxing massage

Six days ago I arrived in Tacloban. It was a chaotic but brilliant few days, revisiting some of the people we worked with last year and being at Mama Pat’s 80th birthday.

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(Mama Pat was woken at midnight for her first cake of the day!)

Two days ago I left to travel to Cebu-an island next door-where I had planned a lot of lounging in the sun and possibly trying out scuba diving.  It turns out though, that typhoons in Manila can affect just about everywhere and it has been a bit like a very slightly warmer version of my childhood holidays in Cornwall; driving rain and wind determined to break something. In my case, my umbrella as I walked to the local beach:

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So today I booked myself my first ever full body massage as a treat.  I had been warned by friends with experience of holiday massages to ‘avoid anything involving coconut husks’. I checked the ‘menu’ to ensure no abrasives were used and chose one that apparently involved yoga positions. I wasn’t clear if it was me or the masseuse who would be yoga-ing but it sounded interesting.

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My masseuse had other ideas when she saw me ‘I think you might prefer something more relaxing’ she suggested ‘the one you have chosen is stretching you, not relaxing you’.

I agreed to go with her suggestion of a relaxing Philippine massage. Only there are definate areas of stress involved in a massage for me. First was when she asked me to choose my oil. I am rubbish at things like this, convinced I will choose the one that smells like toilet cleaner. I chose ‘Laurel’ which 50 minutes later I suspected is exactly what is used to scent Harpic pine fresh.

Next, in the little room screened from the elements and people by only a beaded curtain, she told me to take off my shorts, tshirt and bikini top. I did as I was told but a little voice started wondering in my head just how ‘full’ this massage was and a little panic set in as I lay down on the table.

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There was a thingy to look at in the floor through the hole for my head. I marvelled at the thoughtfulness of this before becoming very irritated by it:

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The dolphins were not evenly spaced. Were there meant to be 6 and they didn’t have room for them all or had someone just put the 5 in incorrectly? Or was it just positioned wrong on the floor?  Luckily this line of thinking was stopped before it could get any more out of hand when the masseuse slapped my feet. Repeatedly.

I then moved between ‘oh that is lovely’ and ‘what the hell?!’ with alarming regularity as she attempted to dislocate each toe (ok, that bit just made me giggle), climbed onto my back, forced the air out of my lungs with some serious back prodding and at one point I started to worry if she’d had a criminal background check done as she appeared to be trying to rip my head from my neck…

Weirdly, overall I found it quite relaxing, although that could have just been relief that I survived. It finished with a tiny cup of ginger tea, so gingery my mouth burned, but I made it through that too.

Before I left my room for the massage I had looked quite presentable. For some reason I had even straightened my hair. When I got back I looked in the mirror. I thought my reflection summed up the experience quite well….:

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:o)

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It’s raining chaos

I go on holiday on Friday.  I’m usually really organised about this sort of thing, but something has gone wrong this year and I’ve left everything right to the very last minute.  This is resulting in a lot of ‘oops moments’ (of the Pog variety, not the Tena Lady advert type).

First, Sister 1 (who is a beautician) kindly offered to dye my eyelashes and eyebrows.  This stops me looking like a surprised pig without make up, so last week I rushed up to her house from work to lie on her sofa with my eyes closed while Little Pea demanded that I ‘Watch this, Pog!’ Other than his demands to open my eyes and the three dogs trying to jump on me it all went swimmingly….until Little Pea decided to do the counting to ten part for one eyebrow (the dye only stays on a very short time so you don’t look like you have slugs attached to your face for the next few weeks).  Little Pea got stuck around number 6.  We spent time starting him again.  I now look like I have one slug suck to my face and one perfectly normal eyebrow.

Next was the Tesco delivery of all my toiletries as I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to fit that shop in.  The man arrived and helped me unpack the rather pathetically small amount I realised I could have shopped for myself.  I felt the need to explain it was all for my holiday and that I was going to the Philippines and that was why I needed so many diarrhoea relief tablets, not because I had a particularly bad stomach….  He literally backed out of the front door wearing a slightly pained expression as I dug myself in deeper and deeper.

I realised at the weekend that my summer sort out for charity last year may have been a bit enthusiastic and I didn’t actually have many vest tops or enough knickers for my two and a half (yes, TWO AND A HALF) weeks away.  I also had an urge to get some trousers for the journey that wouldn’t reduce me to a sweaty mess and were actually comfortable to wear.  I rushed to Tesco after work yesterday but was unimpressed, so hurtled off to Sainsburys where I bought everything I needed.  Then got home to realise that the knickers are a size too small and the trousers two sizes too big.  Oh well, I’ll view the former as body control and the latter, with the waist band turned over twice, roomy.

My ipod broke last week and I was rather humphy to discover that that the newer model doesn’t come with a clip to attach it to anything.  Dad had an idea of super gluing a bulldog clip to the back, which was an idea.  Just not a terribly good one.  I frantically made it a little coat (at least something was the right size last night) – I just need to find some sort of clip for attaching it now.

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At 10pm I realised that was probably the best opportunity I had to dye my hair before leaving.  This is not something you should do in a rush.  As well as the usual spattering over the kitchen work surface, the bathroom sink and the toilet, by dressing grown now has ‘chilli chocolate’ spots and my left ear can best be described as ‘interesting’.

I still have a lot to do around work (until Friday lunch time), yoga and my last upholstery lesson.  Not least, packing.  And I can’t do that until Friday morning as Norman gets upset when he sees my bag.  I think he already knows though.  A lovely friend has leant me her hand luggage bag and at every opportunity Norman sits on it, as though to say ‘You’re not going.  Not a chance.’  At this rate, he might just be right…

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I’ll try to blog while I’m away if I have wifi, although if the posts are a little odd it will be because I’m using my camera….and it wasn’t smooth sailing last time I tried that.  Before I go on my true holiday, I’m going back to see the amazing family I stayed with last year when I did relief work (And finally meet Jackie!).  Jackie and I plan to see some of the beneficiaries we helped last year, so if you need a reminder of any of that work, the blog we wrote together is here:  Helping Hands for Tacloban.  I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to do anything as technical as link to it while I am away.

For now, goodbye and see you soon.  Norman and various people will be guarding Pog Towers for me while I am away, so please don’t get any funny ideas if you’re a wool thief :o)

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