The Propositioning Water Fountain

Posted on November 2, 2010 by thepogblog

As part of the un-fatness plan, I am swimming twice a week now and loving it (well, I went twice last week and the intention is there to continue…).  Frankly, it’s more enjoyable to be in the warm and intentionally getting soggy than to be outside on the bike hoping you can finish the ride without your feet getting so soaked they actually start to wrinkle.

sometimes it's a toss up between the chocolate...

As is usual for me though, there have already been a couple of slightly embarrassing moments (and that doesn’t include the fact that I have become strangely attached to my hand towel so can only cover one thigh on the way to the pool).  I think the highlight to date was last Friday when I was without Sister 1 to chat to and obviously needed to talk to someone.

Most of the regulars are of the ‘oldie’ vintage (I’d like to make it clear here that this is not an ageist comment…just a fact.  Oldies are one of my very, very favourite sort of people), but there are a couple of us around our 30’s.  One is Nose-Clip-Man.  Nose-Clip-Man seems to view the pool as a bath more than a place to exercise and spends a lot of time just standing in the shallow end.  I had been doing an excessive amount of huffing and puffing this day and as I turned and felt the need to explain.

Me: ‘I’m not used to this.’

Him: ‘It’s Friday.  Just take it easy.’

Me: ‘Exactly,  we should be in bed.  Oh.  I didn’t mean ‘we’…  Time for another length…’

...and the wine...

And I did my fastest length for a while, but of course, I then had to face him again on the return journey.  I find the best solution in many situations (as you may have guessed) is to smile, so, as I got a few strokes away from him I attempted just that.  Only I swallowed a huge mouthful of water in the process and rather than smiling at the poor bloke, I ended up impersonating a water fountain as I spat it back out.  And then, because I’d swallowed quite a bit of it, I burped.  (I know.  I wasn’t going to admit to that bit, but at this stage, I’m not sure I can go down any further in anyone’s estimation.)  Nobody could ever accuse me of being ‘smooth’.

Tomorrow morning I will be braving the pool for the first time since the proposition / water fountain incident.  I wonder if Nose-Clip-Man has also been brave enough to go back…:o)

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How the Cookie Fairy came about (and would you like to join her?)

Posted on November 1, 2010 by thepogblog

Are you sitting comfortably?  Then I’ll begin.

Once upon a time (just under 10 months ago actually), Pog gave up the evil cigarettes and instead started baking cookies with the abandon previously only reserved for her smoking.  Eating cookies at the same rate as she smoked was not going to result in a particularly healthy Pog though and she wondered what to do.

cookies!

By happy coincidence (or not happily at all as it happens) life at Pog Towers took a bit of a nose dive and smiling became hard work.  But then Pog had a bit of a plan.  If she wasn’t smiling much, that didn’t mean that she couldn’t make others smile.  And maybe their smiles would spread.  So after a little bit of thought…The Cookie Fairy was born! 

Argh…too weird writing like that. 

As my alter ego, The Cookie Fairy, I anonymously (or so I thought) deliver cookies to people I think might need, like or deserve a smile.  And it makes me smile too when I get texts, mails or phone calls from people laughing at the element of daftness that has gone into the process…(because everybody has realised it was me in a matter of minutes apparently)… and smiling at the fact that someone has taken a little bit of time to do something nice for them.

Love, The Cookie Fairy. x

I was thinking though (and I admit this is not always a good thing), would anybody like to becomes a Cookie Fairy recruit?  Let me know if you would and I will send you some cookies with my secret Cookie Fairy recipe.  All you need to do then is whip a batch together (which literally take 10 minutes) every so often and spread the cookies.  Fancy it?  Think carefully, there are hidden dangers as I have found:

  • People are very security conscious these days and you can only walk on gravel quietly in bare feet.  Walking on gravel in bare feet hurts.
  • The only way to stop security lights going on is to crawl along the outside of the house to the front door.  This gets you odd looks from people passing by.
  • Some dogs start barking as soon as you get out the car.  It requires quite fast movements to get down a drive, to the front door and find a hiding place that the barking dog won’t spot before the intended recipient and back again before you are spotted.
  • Delivering cookies on the bike can result in considerably more crumbs than there should be.
  • Driving around a house 5 times until the oldies inside go to bed makes the oldies think that the house is being staked out by a burglar rather than a cookie fairy (sorry mum and dad).
  • You have to be sure that the recipient won’t be accused of having an admirer / an affair by their other half.  That’s happened twice so far.  Oops…

If you still want to spread the smiles, give me a shout.  I can post cookies if required (there just wont be so many!).  Come on…what else are you going to do with that spare 10 minutes? And you can always make extra and become known as a domestic goddess…:o)

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Ahhhhh…!

Posted on October 31, 2010 by thepogblog

If you are in need of an ‘aaaahhhh’ then this one is for you.  Yesterday Sister 1, Sister 2, Brother-in-law (Bil) and I all went on a road trip to meet Sister 1 and Bil’s puppy.    We packed provisions to get through the 1 hour 40 minute trip (we don’t take any risks on the going hungry front) and got to Broadstairs full of beans.

provisions...

someone may have had a few too many E-numbers...

 

Lola. ahhhhh...!

 

We all melted when we met Lola, the soon to be new addition to the family. (Lola is only 4 weeks so wont be leaving for another 3 weeks).

I cuddled Tinkerbelle who is the runt of the litter.  She fell straight to sleep on me…

Tinkerbelle. ahhhh...(again)!

 

And then to burn off all the excitement we went for a run along Margate beach…

pretty beach...

...but maybe not

 

Y...M...C...A

A very smiley day for all 4 of us I think (Although possibly less so for Bil who had to put up with three girls in a relatively confined space.  Well done Bil:o)  )

Didn't we have a lovely time, the day we went to Margate? (To be sung to the song with similar words)

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A small un-fatness plan update

Posted on October 26, 2010 by thepogblog

Well, the un-fatness plan has started.  This morning I was in the changing rooms of the local pool wondering:

1) how to get out (thank goodness for Little Sister 1) and

2) why I hadn’t checked the size of my towel when I had extracted it from the depths of the airing cupboard (it turned out I had selected a hand towel and had to make serious decisions over which small part of me it was going to cover on the walk to the side of the pool.)

It turns out that 3000 miles of cycling does not prepare you for 50 lengths of swimming, especially the part where you drink your daily quota of water (with a dash of chlorine) in 40 minutes.  I ached within 10 lengths and I still hurt now.  The un-fatness plan continues though with a spot of pole dancing tomorrow night and another morning swim on Friday.  If I can move at the weekend I’ll try to get on the bike, but no promises at this stage!

Thank you to Little Sister 1 who is essential to the un-fatness plan, particularly in relation to finding changing room exits. (Little Sister 2 is also great, but mainly at sneaking me nice food when Little Sister 1 isn’t looking!):o)

Apparently if I am not going to use the bike, Charlie is...

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The joys of spell check

Posted on October 25, 2010 by thepogblog

There was a bit of a discussion today on Twitter on words that you consistently type incorrectly.  Mine is ‘the’ which always comes out ‘teh’.  It would be better to have a slightly less common word, but at least spell check is always there.

Well, kind of…we’ve all had times that spell check doesn’t help because it sees fit to change words to something your really didn’t mean at all.

My list includes:

  • When a colleague asked me to ‘review the attracted’ on an e-mail.  Sadly when I enquired who the attracted person was that I was reviewing, it turned out she had meant the ‘attached’ document.

    when dawn has not even broken on the way in ...maybe you can be forgiven the odd 'oops'

    when dawn has not even broken on the way in to work maybe you can be forgiven the odd 'oops'

  • Informing people I am a ‘little bust’.  Although accurate in every sense, this was actually supposed to inform that I was a bit busy…
  • My manager a few years back was called Satnam.  A name spell check doesn’t recognise, so instead of the sensible work e-mails I intended, I ended up frequently (accidently) writing to the extremes of either Santa or Satan…
  •  A friend told me of a mistake she had seen at a previous job.  One of her colleagues wrote to some shirt makers…only she forgot the ‘r’ in shirt.  Worse still, the word ‘counterfeit’ was also included…minus the ‘o’…!
Although it could just be distraction - this is the gorgeous view from my desk!

although it could just be distraction - this is the gorgeous view from my desk!

The last one (for now) isn’t a spell check issue…it’s more of a Pog issue.  When I get held up by a person I refer to it as being, for example, Poged, Petered, or Davided.  One of my managers is called Roger.  I didn’t think about it when I joined a meeting late and apologised that it was because I was being Rogered…  They smiled.  I nearly died of embarrassment:o)

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The Donut Club, the secret to eternal life and 3000 miles done and dusted!

Posted on October 24, 2010 by thepogblog

when it rains, look for rainbows

Last week I mentioned being asked out.  Ok, being asked if I wanted to join in a group bike ride…and mentioned my hope that I may meet a 6 foot plus hunk of gorgeousness.  This is the update:

Not too surprisingly I didn’t.  Due to the rain that was saturating the southeast on Saturday morning most of the group cried off, so I joined just three very lovely, patient and fit men for a 30ish mile bike ride.  Their combined age was a little over 200.  However, either they have discovered the secret of eternal life or they are the best advert for cycling I have ever seen.  None of them looked anywhere near their age; they were all far fitter than me and were really interesting both in terms of their lives and their knowledge of local history.  It even turned out that despite living a fair distance away at the time, in the 1950s two of them used to frequent what was a cyclist café and is now my parent’s house!  Even better, the ride finished with coffee, cake and brandy and the discovery that the group call themselves The Donut Club – how perfect for me is that?!

the sun always comes out...eventually!

That was Saturday.  Today I did a few more miles and made it to my 2010 target of 3000 miles (HOORAY!).  The plan was that I would now swap my cycling for swimming but I enjoyed The Donut Club so much though I think I’ll keep Saturdays to join them whenever I can.  Anyway, you never know, one of them might have a son…or grandson…:o)

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Off with their balls!

Posted on October 21, 2010 by thepogblog

It is possible Charlie has an inkling that something is going on...

Tomorrow is the day that my boys may start to hate me forever as it is the day their balls get lopped off.  Well, it has to be done…they are staying out late and I suspect that a female may be involved which frankly, I am just not having.

I should perhaps point out here that (in case you didn’t know) ‘the boys’ are my kittens.  Unfortunately, I usually assume other people will instinctively know this.  And that is how awkward conversations come about.  Like the one at lovely neighbours little person’s christening.  It went a bit like this:

Her:  ‘So, I heard you saying you have two boys?’

Me:   ‘Erm, yes.’

Her:  ‘How old are they?’

Me:   ‘Um.  4 months.  Do you have any….?’

Her:  ‘They’re twins then?  Where are they?  I’ve not seen any here.’

Me:   (Without engaging brain) ‘Oh, they’re at home.  They’re really quite well house trained now.’

Her:  ‘Sorry?!’

Me:   (Right.  You need to explain this fast… Idiot)

...Norman just wants to get out...

So tomorrow the deed will be done.  And once again, it is A Very Good Thing that I don’t really have children as I’m not sure how I’d cope when they started showing an interest in the opposite sex (and I’m pretty sure that ball lopping is not available on the NHS…)

For now I am off to stop Norman from breaking through the locked cat flap (they have to stay in tonight so they don’t snack on the local wildlife.  This is not going down well).  I can see a lot of cat treats being got through this evening.  At least I’ll have happy cats…for now:o)

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How to make soup without having to wash up your bananas…

Posted on October 19, 2010 by thepogblog

It’s not often you have to wash up your bananas.  Or your clementines for that matter, but most are probably a bit better at making soup than me…

I have come up with a recipe (by accident more than design) which I thought I’d share with you, (pitfalls and all) as it is cheap, tasty and filling (and might be more useful that my usual blogs).  So:

just thought I'd add a random happy picture to make it a bit more interesting...

Tomato and Chilli Beef Soup:

  • 2 chopped carrots
  • 1 chopped onion     
  • 1 chopped leek                  
  • 1 small swede / turnipy thing      
  • 2 tins tomatoes
  • Tomato puree
  • Drained tin of chickpeas
  • Pack of Tesco’s chilli beef (found near the cold meat / pate)

 

  • Throw the veggies into a saucepan containing a litre of boiling water and vegetable stock.

 (Use a large saucepan or get ready to do some juggling shortly). 

  • Boil till the veggies are soft, add the tins of tomatoes and puree and throw in the chickpeas. 

(If your saucepan is not big enough this is the point where juggling becomes a skill you wish you’d taken more seriously up until now)

  • Boil again for a few minutes, then blend in a food processor.   

(Should your food processor break half way through the blending, I strongly suggest popping to the lovely neighbours house to borrow hers straight away rather than trying to puree with a small electric cake mixer first.  That’s how you end up having to wash up your bananas, clementines, kittens, walls, cupboards and trousers.  In short, it looks a little like you are responsible for the gruesome deaths of at least 5 people…)

  • When it’s all mixed up, pop into individual serving bags, cut up and add 1.5 pieces of chilli beef per serving and throw the bags in the freezer.

(Note: if like me you sweat in the presence of a korma you might want some yoghurt handy when you eat the soup as it has a bit of a kick).

presentation was never my strong point, but trust me, it tastes better than it looks!

Happy soup day!

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A bit of a daydream and a bit of an invite

Posted on October 17, 2010 by thepogblog

I just thought this was a happy sort of a picture...

I have been asked out.  Sadly, not by a 6 foot plus hunk of gorgeousness who is going to throw me over his shoulder and whisk me off into the sunset (yes, I admit in this daydream I am a little demanding with my man requirements and a little deluded in how light-as-a feather I have become but it is a daydream). 

No, this is the asking out of a Pog so it is obviously not of that variety.  However, I was asked by two men.  I imagine their combined aged is somewhere between 120 and 170 and to add insult to injury they were overtaking me on their bikes just before they stopped, but hey ho.  It turned out that I know one of the lovely gentleman (he arranges the sportive that made me achey in September) and he and his friend have very kindly invited me on the group cycle that they take part in each week. So yes, I wasn’t really asked out at all but it was close.  Sort of.  Ish.

I have no idea who makes up the rest of the group, if any of them are under 60 or if I am fit enough to keep up with them, but maybe it is time to have a conversation with something with two legs when I am on the bike (rather than spiders, sheep and horses).  And maybe, just maybe I will meet a 6 foot plus hunk of gorgeousness who is going to throw me over his shoulder and whisk me off into the sunset…:o)

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Pog tip of the day

Posted on October 15, 2010 by thepogblog

I just thought I’d pass on the tip I learned from my experiences today.

When out cycling (or taking part in any other outside activity I guess), should you see a cat hiding under a car don’t make kissing noises and say ‘hello gorgeous’ to it unless you are sure there is nobody else around who may not be aware of the cat. The result otherwise is a slightly startled man who, judging by his rather terrified expression, thinks a strange cyclist is blowing kisses and generally being a bit over friendly towards him…

And while I am on the subject of cats, it might be useful to know that kittens can actually chew the whole way though the wires of a phone

The feline chewers of cables

charger.  And a mouse (of the PC variety).  And they also know when a tv programme is about to reach a critical point as that is when they decide to chew on the aerial socket and loose reception.

They’re great though.  And I bet that man at least had something different to think about on his way to work…:o)

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