Ear-Wigging

Posted on March 7, 2011 by thepogblog

I love ear wigging.  I overheard a conversation in a lift at work today between two girls that made me giggle.  It went something like:

Girl 1:  I like the furry collar on your coat.  I had to take mine off this morning cos my boyfriend spilled milk over it.

Girl 2:  Couldn’t you have just sponged it off?

Girl 1:  No.  The milk was full of coco pops.  (Then, in a pondering voice) I’m sure it’s only 4 year olds and my boyfriend that get overexcited while eating breakfast, run through the house holding a full bowl then fall flat on their face, spraying the contents of the bowl everywhere…

Later, a girl was explaining how last summer she’d been wearing heels, attempting to impersonate a professional, independent woman while walking between a lot of very busy bars.  Somehow, her heel got stuck in a crack in the pavement.  So stuck, the only way to get it out was to take the shoe off and tug at it with both hands while being sniggered at by the few hundred real independent professionals enjoying a drink and the sun.

I didn’t laugh so much at that one although a couple of others in the lift did.  I didn’t laugh so much because, yes, it was me… 

So, if you see someone walking in heels on tip toes now, you’ll know why.

And I’ll keep on ear wigging in the lift in the hope that I’ll hear more daft stories than I have to tell :o)

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Out-doors-ness

Posted on March 6, 2011 by thepogblog

It was mum’s birthday this week and for part of her present I took her on a course to ‘learn to make rustic plant supports with hazel wood’.  Mum is a keen gardener so I thought it would appeal.  I prefer looking at the garden from inside a warm house but I thought it might be a giggle…

I was not giggling however, when I discovered that the unfatness plan has not yet got me back to anywhere near my smoking days size as I couldn’t fit in my gardening trousers (last worn well over a year ago!).  After a small panic when it looked like my only option might be to wear an old pair of pyjamas, I found an old pair of tracksuit bottoms which looked beautiful teamed with wellies and 9 layers of fleeces (it was a blimin’ cold day!).

Next, Mum arrived with saw, loppers, secateurs and a big tarpaulin.  To cut it short, we had a lot of demonstrations in the most gorgeous garden of a lovely, slightly bonkers, lady’s house and then we were let loose on her hazel trees to cut off and take home as much as we liked.

Which we did…

And then we had a go ourselves…

We felt we had mastered the beehive (to support plants as they grow through it)

But the weaving is probably a hazel based cat arse-imal and should not have been attempted…

Oops… :o)

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Continued technique issues

Posted on March 4, 2011 by thepogblog

Well, it seems that my technique in the pool really is that bad.  I was questioned about it again today.  By Nose-Clip-Man!  He wasn’t quite as direct as Sister 2’s friend the other week, but to be honest, I wouldn’t have noticed if he had been.  

Why?  Because this quite well built, obviously very fit, good looking bloke…sounds like

Charlie attempts to stop me from going swimming...

 Mickey Mouse when he talks!  I was so shocked about the mis-match between body and voice that I was impressed I could still explain about my nose clip requirement despite my deformed giraffe swimming position.

As well as being surprised, I left feeling a bit smug as I am started to be accepted by the morning  swimming clique (the Morning Mafia).  This may have taken a little longer than average due to the fact that I (accidentally) propositioned Nose-Clip-Man early on, but I got a good morning from Don Sideways-Swim.  Now that is real progress!

So that’s the social side sorted.  Now I just need to work on my technique :o)

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A couple of hidden smiles

Posted on March 3, 2011 by thepogblog

Some of you lovely people have enquired about how my view of the brick wall is in the new office.  I can confirm it is still there. 

Today I was wishing it was all the way around me though, as the bloke on the desk opposite sniffed and spluttered in my direction.  Then he got a tissue out (hooray!).  And made a twisty thing with it which he shoved up is nose.  And followed with his finger.  Almost up to his elbow.  Then he inspected what he’d retrieved.  Why would anyone think that was ok?

But I digress.  I’ve found that if I wander to the big bosses area they have a better view, so before anyone arrived today I took a few photos of the architectural salvage yard they look out over.

 

Cool isn’t is?

It’s great finding unexpected things when you think that all there is out there is a brick wall.  (I just have to get a lot more important if I want to permanently swap the view to that from snotty bloke).

Here’s another (In London, but not from the office).

So there you go.  A couple of hidden smiles :o)

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Oops!

Posted on February 28, 2011 by thepogblog

They say you should try everything once.  Perhaps I should have given this one a miss though.

But since I did, here we go.

Introducing the newest Pogimal…Cat-Arse-imal:

 

It’s not just me is it?  No.  Didn’t think so.  Oops :o)

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A Weekend of Creativity

Posted on February 27, 2011 by thepogblog

I think it is fair to say that it has been a creative weekend.

Sisters 1, 2 and I went on a course to learn to string buttons.

Sister 2 was very creative in that she was the only one who had to use both hands, her mouth and occasionally her knees to deal with the wire.

Sister 1 was creative in that she managed to persuade the teacher to make 90% of her bracelet and then Sister 2 to finish it off.

We all produced something though, which I think the rest of the rather elderly and slightly uptight class were more than a little surprised about.

 

Boyfriend of Sister 2 got creative with a pair of tights…

…And today I’ve ‘given birth’ to a few more Pogimals and managed to take some down to Mad Hatters Emporium; a local shop which is selling them on my behalf  (so exciting!)

I also got right into the necklace making and tried making some more.  Norman thought it was a great game though and embracing his Labrador persona, got creative with hiding places for the buttons, wire and the finished product… We had to have serious words.

If you think that was creative though, wait til next weekend’s blog.  I’m taking my mum on a course, but this one involves wellies, tough gloves and a small saw… :o)

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Size isn’t everything you know…

Posted on February 23, 2011 by thepogblog

I really object to being a grown up sometimes. And I REALLY object to an estate agent talking to me about ‘my generation and maybe even yours’ as though I was old enough to be his mother.  Grrr.

We do 'compact' well :o)

I had Pog Towers valued by a couple of estate agents today.  I was a little concerned that the size may be a let down – I may have mentioned before that I live in the smallest house ever built.  It was summed up really well a few years back by a friends little boy (out of the mouths of babes and all that) when he walked through the house, got to the back door and enquired, in all innocence. ‘Where’s the rest?’

Neither of the estate agents were quite that direct but I did feel a bit daft showing them around in five steps.  Cosy and compact is what the boys and I like though, so I think we will stay here and cultivate the ‘mad cat woman’ label I’m pretty sure the neighbours have given me on the quiet.

Staying put saves having to deal with young whipper-snapper estate agents too which frankly, can only be a good thing :o)

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Worming and Wellies

Posted on February 20, 2011 by thepogblog

I took the boys to the vets on Friday for their worming tablets and their 3 monthly check (Norman may have now moved from labrador status to that of a puma but it’s nothing to worry about…yet, apparently).  The visits – or at least the drive there and back – usually result in a bath when we arrive, a bath when we get home, a couple of grumpy fur balls and a very stinky car.

This time though, (possibly because I severely limited the biscuit intake) there was no a poo in sight, let alone covering them both.  Instead we had a bit of a sing-song in the car.

I am very proud.

The next lesson is to teach them to wear their wellies when it is muddy.  Or at least not to climb on the bed if they wont… :o)

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Speed? Check. Nap? Check. Distance? Check. Technique? Erm…

Posted on February 18, 2011 by thepogblog

The un-fatness plan has been back on with a vengeance this week and this morning I was particularly proud of myself.  Firstly because I managed to master the art of the two second swim nap (yes, really) and secondly because I finally feel I have earned my right to be in the medium lane (rather than the slow lane) as I can consistently match the pace of most of the other swimmers.

The downside of the medium lane is the vast quantity of testosterone contained within it.  It seems most blokes have to overtake as many swimmers as possible in a splashy fashion to demonstrate their masculinity and the fact that they are almost fast enough for the fast lane.  I managed to cope though and became proud of myself for a third reason when I finished 100 lengths.

Proud that is, until I got home and Sister 1 called up and told me to look at her wall on Facebook… 

To cut a long story short, she and a friend had realised that he and I had been swimming at the same time.  In the same pool.  In the same lane.

Their conversation went something like this:

Sister 1:  She wears a blue hat and nose clip…and only swims breast stroke

Him: Blue hat and nose clip…. I think I overtook her, she did not look happy so I dared not do it again…

Sister 1: she isn’t speedy but that’s cause she won’t put her face in the water!

Him: Why does she wear nose clips then?

Then I was informed and joined in to set the record straight – that I was not in the wrong lane as I too was over taking people and that I was not unhappy he overtook – that is just my face.  And than I got this:

Him: I was surprised with how fast you were able to swim with such awful technique!!! :oP

Charming!

I do admit that I look like a deformed giraffe when I swim.  And I wear the nose clip to stop water going up my nose while my head stays above the water at all times (it never goes under water intentionally).  But hey, I am getting more speedy and I am able to swim for longer, so my awful technique and I will continue as we are.  And we may even develop the two second swim nap further…you read it here first!  :o)

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A new toy and a step back in time

Posted on February 16, 2011 by thepogblog

You know how some people have a ‘calling’ in life?  In their career, or to be a mum or to do some ridiculous level of goodness?  Well, I think I have now identified mine. 

I think my calling was to be a 1950’s housewife.  The flaw here being that I was born around 60 years too late and don’t have a husband.  Not one to be deterred by such minor details though, I am embracing my alter ego with a passion.  Because yesterday there was great excitement at Pog Towers.  Yesterday, my very first, very grown up sewing machine was delivered!

To take a step back (as they say a lot at work), a while ago I made a pact with myself.  I decided that when I had £100 in my pot from selling cards I was allowed to buy something frivolous that I could not justify spending real money on (card money, in my head has evidently developed some sort of ‘unreal’ quality).  I set my heart on a huge wooden toadstool to go in the garden.  Oversized, overpriced, but very lovely indeed.  I met my £100 target a couple of weeks ago and decided to trundle to the garden centre for my prize, only to have second thoughts – it did seem a bit of a waste of money, even unreal money.

The first project...

And that is when I had my brainwave!  If I bought a sewing machine, not only could I run up Pogimals at the speed of light, but I could also work on a whole host of other stuff. 

To my amazement, last night I managed singlehandedly and without having to resort to the Pog helpline (calling mum) to wind bobbins, thread the machine and even make a Pogimal (admittedly, it was far from ‘at the speed of light’, but I might get there eventually).

The only real issues I had were that scaredy cat Charlie bolts for the cat flap as soon as the machine makes a noise while hard-as-nails Norman has taken to trying to catch the needle as it sews…

I’m sure the excitement over my new toy is not quite fitting for a singleton in 2011, but hey ho.  Now I just have to see if I can make that ‘whole host of other stuff’ with it :o)

Here's one I made earlier :o)

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