I guess we’ve all had someone say something about us behind our backs at some point, whether we know it or not. And usually that something is linked, at least a little bit, to some sort of reality. I thought that was how gossip worked, anyway. But apparently not. Because this week I’ve been told a story that we think has probably been around for about 4 years.
It’s a story about someone whose husband died, so they cut off all their hair and (presumably as a sign of mourning) have kept it short ever since. And that person is….ME. You know: the me who until very recently was more single than Bridget Jones. The me whose only men in their future were expected to be of the furball variety. The me who has never been married. And the me who does indeed have short hair, but only because after this it seemed easier for all sorts of reasons.
I discovered this story when Himself went out with some colleagues and one of them mentioned my deceased husband and associated short hair. Himself told me the full story when he got home, only to realise that was really all he knew. There were no details, like had we been married long? Did I have children who had managed to pass me by as well? Was my husband good looking? I sent him back to the colleague the next day to find out answers to these questions and, more importantly, to see if she knew where the daft story had started. We think that it was someone who I have never met, spoken to, or ever had any interaction with had told another colleague who had in turn told this one. Sadly, there were no answers to the other questions which will leave me wondering for a while about how he filled in those gaps (because I assume if you’ve made up this much, you’d at least have a full picture in your head).
I don’t know if I should be bemused, amused or confused. I don’t know why someone who doesn’t know me would make up something so completely unconnected to me about me. And I don’t know how in 4 years nobody has mentioned it to me. It’s strange. But probably worth bearing in mind the next time someone tells you a story about someone else that it might very well have absolutely no link to reality!
(On the upside, in the midst of all my singleness, at least someone thought that it wasn’t permanent. Even if they had never met me.) :o)
the pog blog 
Hi,
I hadn’t heard that one, but I suspect that the colleagues who came up with it would be of a more recent vintage than me.
You could imagine it coming up: A: “I wonder why she’s cut her hair off?”; B: “No idea. Did you know in some countries, widows cut their hair?”. Next day: C: “I wonder why she’s cut her hair off?” A: “we think it’s because her husband has died”.
Once you’ve got a supposed dead husband, no-one will dare ask about it.
A colleague of mine has a very ill wife. But I have no idea what illness it is, nor whether I’m supposed to know what it is or not. So I nod sagely and sympathetically, but don’t dare ask now what it is.
Of course, I have no idea whether there is a place in the world where widows shave their hair. I’m not sure that that makes the story less likely.
Equally, of course, I don’t know whether I’m supposed to know who Himself is, or if he’s anyone I know. But I don’t dare ask…. :-)
Yes, I guess that could be how it happened. It’s all just a bit weird to me. My way of doing things would be to see if I could help rather than just taking in the story, so I’d have got o the bottom of things pretty fast, but I understand that for some people that would too much, and maybe it’s just my way to ask to many questions :o)
And for the record, you do know him and you can always ask me anything. Worse case I’ll just tell you I don’t fancy talking about it, but that’s rare ;o)