Pole dancing is not for me. I am not the delicate, light-as-a-feather, bendy sort of person that you need to be. I am more of a heffalump in shorts. This makes it very hard to pop myself upside down on the pole and let go with everything except a left little toe. It is a good giggle, but mostly for the rest of the class. And while I like making people smile, I don’t particularly like paying £40 a month for the privilege (although to be fair I have acquired a huge range of bruises and cuts as well for that money).
So instead of dancing of the pole tomorrow night I will be aerobicing of the water (or doing aqua aerobics if you want the more widely recognised term). I am hoping that I will incur fewer injuries by being surrounded by water and that by doing a few lengths before hand it will help in the progress of the un-fatness plan more than standing next to a pole saying ‘well I can’t do that’.
I do have a concern though. I tried this aqua aerobic thingy once before, years ago. Woggles were handed out to lie back and balance on while legs were waved around (a woggle being similar to a 4 foot long foam pipe cleaner). The woggles ran out when they got to me so I was handed armbands to go around my wrists. While the rest of the class laid back on their woggles in a relatively relaxed manner, I lay back and everything sunk apart from my hands which were disproportionately buoyant…
On the upside, on the basis that I’ve had my aqua aerobics disaster, I am sure that tomorrow will be a huge success. Won’t it….?