Oh lordy. I’ve seen a video of myself running. This is not good.
I started running 5 months ago. I was warned by my sisters over the years never to do so in public, and I didn’t. But I was talked into a beginners course by the lovely people at my fit ball class and thought I’d take the risk. I was so proud of my achievements – I run 5k every week on my own and around 8k with the running group every Saturday. I’m not good, but I enjoy it, and I can finally fit back in the trousers that became a bit of a gamble to sit down in last year.
When I run on my own, it’s around Bumpkinsville. I started running through the fields, so I couldn’t be seen, but as I got more confident I moved to the roads (with the added benefit that I didn’t have to run sideways through waist high nettles or get soggy feet from long grass). People smile at me when I run. I thought it was that Bumpkinsville was full of friendly people. Now I know better. I’m pretty sure they are all laughing at me.
Because that video? Everyone else in it looks elegant, effortless. But wow. I look like a lump on legs with uncontrollable arms. I actually appear to be trying out the upper cut punches I was taught at kickboxing years ago. (I was terrible at that too – so terrible I put myself in hospital after kicking….well, thin air.) I told Sister 1. She said Sister 2 told her I breathe funny when I run too. So now I know I look and sound ridiculous. The irony of all this is that I blogged about the beginners course on their site as ‘The Three Legged Donkey’ – I should have gone for ‘Black Beauty’ (Or Chilli Chocolate Beauty, if we’re going to be accurate about it) – it might have been some sort of self fulfilling prophesy.
The problem is that I have (very stupidly) signed up for a 10k run in November. Lots of people will see me. I mentioned this to Sister 1. When she stopped laughing, she suggested a costume. I may have to crochet one.
Tonight I am off to fit ball. I just hope nobody has any bright ideas about videoing that, or my exercise options are likely to dramatically reduce :o)