In a blog post a while back I mentioned a fantabulous idea I had. It turned out my writing wasn’t very clear that day as although some of my friends had understood that I had a fantabulous idea, they didn’t actually know what it was…
The idea was, essentially, that I join an ‘Introduction Agency’. And I can now confirm that I have been interviewed and am on their books. Gulp.
I prepared for my 1.5 hour interview in two different ways. The first involved a 5 minute conversation with Lovely Little Man and Gorgeous Godson’s Mum and Dad to decide what I was looking for. Having not really considered this before we decided that ‘single with a pulse’ would be the key criteria. GG’s dad enquired as to whether ‘own teeth’ were essential. I decided not, as long as they stayed in at all times. Apparently I don’t have terribly high standards.
They second part of my preparation was cleaning. I might love Pog Towers and the slight chaos involved in living in a house the size of a shed but I needed to impress. So I moved as much as I could into the wardrobe / under the bed / into the car and cleaned everything else to within an inch of its inanimate life. I removed stains that had been in the carpet longer than I wanted to think about, I cleaned the oven (no, I have no idea what made me think my interview might include a check in there) and I used drain cleaner down the sinks.
Pog Towers sparkled. I tried to do the same. Intro Lady arrived. Charlie ran in with muddy paws and walked the length of the kitchen work surface several times so when Intro Lady got to the kitchen it looked like I’d not even made a teeny effort. Norman then wandered in looking cute, Intro Lady picked him up, and Norman attacked her. The cuts on her hand were so deep I actually considered offering her a bandage. So it started well….
In retrospect, a longer conversation with GGs Mum and Dad on the sort of person I am looking for would have been a better use of my time than the cleaning effort, but you’ll be happy to know Intro Lady managed to refine my requirements somewhat as a result of the interview. (Taming Norman would have been the best use of my time, but may have delayed getting this far in the process by a few years).
So now I just have to find some photos that I (and this is a direct quote) ‘feel are flattering’ and that were ‘taken no more than 12 months ago’. I think the last flattering photo of me was taken about 23 years ago so I’m not sure how we’re going to approach that one. Once I have though, I review and approve my profile and we’re good to go. Intro Lady will then find me the man of my dreams… (Just let me dream for a bit. We all know it’s not likely to run that smoothly!)
And in other news, this is a last bit of Christmas I saw out on the bike this morning that made me giggle :o)