Sister 1 called me today.
Sister 1: Hello?
Me: I can’t talk. I’m at the hospital waiting for an old person appointment.
Sister 1: Have you taken Dad somewhere?
But I hadn’t. It was for me. I’d been sent a letter about an ‘NHS Checkup for 40-70 year olds’ a while back. As I am not 40 (quite), I ignored it. Then I got a letter from the doctor surgery ticking me off for not booking so I gave in. So today I went to the hospital for what turned out to be a bit of an MOT and a bit of a heart check.
For the first time ever, I passed every test with flying colours. Blood pressure? Perfect. Cholesteral? Double what the good part should be (no, I don’t really understand that either). Heart age? A tender 37. BMI? Even that was within the healthy range.
There was a small misunderstanding / sense of humour failure on the diet area though. She asked if I ate fruit and vegetables. I said that weirdly, I had recently become slightly obsessed with them and they now made up the bulk of my food.
‘You do really need to balance your diet, though’ she said.
‘Oh, it’s balanced’, I replied. ‘This morning, for example, I had lemon juice and hot water, a banana nutribullet and finished it all off with four chocolate biscuits.’
Apparently she meant protein.
But hey ho, I passed all the tests and my form got ticks in all the right places, which has to be a first. And after cutting down my 12 coffees and 10 teas to one of each, and my smoking to nothing in the last three weeks, I’m not about to give up the chocolate biscuits too! :o)