Step Mumming is way harder than I ever anticipated.

Not just the fact that not all step children may want you around and make that fact very known to you, but the balancing act of being useful but not treading on any actual parents toes while also not assuming that all parenting is being done by any of the other adults in the equation.

And I think I might have got that balance a bit wrong in one particular area.  Stepson 1 (I can’t call them ‘Little’ and ‘Big’ any more as at 14 and 18 they are both great lumps now)… so yes, Stepson 1 intends to go to uni in September.  He has a conditional place, all the enthusiasm for it and a giant brain when it comes to maths and computers.  What he doesn’t have is much common sense.  What he has even less of is the ability to cook for himself.

The weekends they are here he makes his own lunch and helps with peeling vegetables etc and I kind of assumed he probably did more cooking at home in the week.  His grandparents bought him a student cook book for Christmas though, and on our first practice I realised that if things stayed as they were, ham and cheese sandwiches and peeled carrots might be the only thing he’d be eating when he went away.

I also discovered that student cookbooks are pretty useless.  The first recipe he selected to try was salmon fillets with spring onions.  The second option: steak and home made chips.  I explained that it’s unlikely that 1) his budget will stretch that far 2) he’ll the time or the inclination to cook these sorts of dishes, so we selected something a bit easier and more useful to practice.

And then I discovered that student cookbooks assume a level of understanding in the kitchen.  Stepson 1 wasn’t sure how to slice an onion.  And had no clue what to do with a pepper.  Or how big a ‘pinch’ was.  He didn’t know the difference between a spring onion and celery.

So – with a slight worry that I might be stepping on toes, but doing it anyway, we have gone right back to basics, started talking about prices of this vs that and  ‘if you had this left over, how could you use it to make another meal?’

Since January we’ve covered:

Sausage and Tomato spaghetti (so much pride):

‘Quick’ Ham and cheese pasties (took what felt like nine hours but might have only been one):

Spaghetti Bolognaise (they ate four portions between them):

Omelettes (‘I had no idea they were so easy’):

Pepperoni pizza (‘But it looks like a real pizza!’):

Meatballs in homemade tomato sauce with spaghetti:

For the last two I’d written (very detailed) instructions on what to do and backed away from the kitchen unless shouted for, so he practically did them himself.

The boy’s done good.  And he can chop up an onion without supervision now.

In fact the boy has done so good, Stepson 2 has decided that as soon as he goes to uni he’ll be up for a visit as he’s quite keen on his brothers cooking.

And in other news, I made the boys a chocolate cake while they were at the football for weekend snacks, which Stepson 2 confirmed maintained my status as ‘bad ass step mum‘, which I’ll take.

I’ve just realised, for someone who spent years mostly eating toast and yoghurt, between Mum and Stepson 1, I’m not doing too badly on the cooking lesson front.  Who would ever have thunk it? 🙂